In a conversation with a successful entrepreneur buddy of mine, he offered an interesting (to me) perspective to take with regards to making forward motion your life. His premise is that most people tend to look for work that "suits their current needs or personalities." This is wrong, according to my friend. Rather, a person should adapt his or her ideas looking for a job that will suit their future needs.
Overheard at a coffee shop, regarding a final presentation for a college communications class:
"Three of us were accountants, but the fourth was a geo-engineer. We all wore business casual, but he wore sneakers and a t-shirt and a backwards baseball cap that he refused to take off [emphasis from speaker]."
In my almost twenty years in the mobile and semi-conductor industry, I've never stood around and chatted with co-workers around the watercooler. Either the business I was in simply didn't have water coolers to stand around, or there the water cooler was just located in the most inconvenient of places, like next to the boss's office. So no standing around for me.
At whatever age you learn to ride a bike (if you have done so), it's safe to say it's no easy task, at least initially. When you're young, you're own body and pressure from parents and peers gets in the way just as much as learning how a bicycle work does; and when you're older, habits and attitude can be just as inhibiting.
Yet, once a you pass some magic threshold, it's as if you've always known how to ride. Sure, you're not an expert; you're not going to be doing stunts and you'll stumble here and there, but the hard part is done and a "naturalness" replaces most of the struggles. Why is that? And how does it apply to public speaking?
We're creatures of habit, pattern-making machines. We crave novelty and often (well, at least I do) overindulging in social media, videos, TV, eating, drinking, etcetera, just to get that dopamine rush.
But feedback — like in the form of an evaluation of a speech your developing, or a valid critique from you boss — is almost always a novel experience as well, right?
Fruitful feedback is a form of productive novelty.
When I was a kid, I was terminally shy. The concept of eye contact was as terrifying as jumping off a bridge. The sensation of the hair raising on my back each time I'd even glance someone's way was a clear sign of being in a flight response. If I didn't know you, I probably barely would look you in the eye.
Thankfully, partly through the miracle of puberty and then practice through college, I had far less trouble making eye contact with folks; came to understand the cultural norms regarding it as well, just so I didn't overshoot any tender boundaries.
What I've noticed over the years in networking and business meetings is almost an inverse problem that I had — people are too focused on eye contact. Not in a creepy way, but in an exclusitory way.
Imagine how you feel when you walk into someone home (hopefully your own!) and smell the comforting and warm scent of chocolate chip cookies, and apple pie, or cinnamon buns. Right away, you know what's coming. Deliciousness!
You don't have to see the cookies to know they are ready to eat. You know way ahead of time. In speech making, you'll want to do the same for audience. Provide a 'scent' that will stick with the crowd, an odor that will heighten anticipation and delight when expectations are fulfilled.
Less about about public speaking, more about being connected with your fellow human being — which, really you should be shooting for when you're giving a presentation or speech anyway. But more specifically, when it comes to the work environment:
Connectedness is Effectiveness
My thoughts are in this article on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/connectedness-effectiveness-adam-kecskes/
Oh, man.
Did I take things way too seriously when I first started getting into management and leadership roles. Way too seriously.
Humor goes a long way towards creating powerful relationships and rapport. Don't underestimate it. And seriously, don't take yourself too seriously.
My first "real" job in tech was with a local internet service provider, or ISP. This was just when the ubiquity of the Web was not quite there and AOL had their marketing campaign to drown everyone in compact discs with their AOL Onlne platform.
I worked there for less than a year. A coworker of mine mentioned that Qualcomm, a massive tech company (and even bigger nowadays) was hiring for a much better hour salary. Trying to keep some sense of loyalty to the current company I was at, I gave notice and took the time to have a meeting with my boss so I could tell him what was up.
That meeting did not go well.